Our Top 12 come out for the usual intros, and Melanie's romper outfit leads me to wonder: what is it about dancers and the high waisted short shorts? Is it functional in some way? Because by and large, it ain't flattering. Enjoy your pairings tonight, dancers, because next week the All-Stars join us and all our couples, "power" or otherwise, will be split up.Cat says "it was a close shave tonight, we are live." Was there a technical ish? is that why she looks a little smeary and sweaty? She doesn't tell us, just introduces the judges. Our chosen four tonight include guest judge Jesse Tyler Ferguson. You may know him from "Modern Family," or like me, you may have seen him in "The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee," which was great. Cat tells us that "for the very first time we have someone with an extensive Broadway background." Um, didn't you just have Kristin Chenoweth two weeks ago? WTF? And our choreography-judge tonight is Sonya Tayeh. She's completely nuts, so I expect her to judge in the Lil C mold. Jesse acknowledges that yes, he did a little Broadway, but also shouts out his extensive theme park experience in shows like "Celebrate Freedom" or "The Country Connection." Oh, JTF, I'm falling in love. Please tell me you'll be funny all night.
No time to waste, as each couple is doing two dances this evening. We start out with Sasha & Alex, dancing a paso doble choreographed by Tony and Melanie (the choreo, not the contestant). (Anyone else have trouble telling Tony and Jean-Marc apart? You never see them together, so for all I know, they're the same person.) I'm happy to see a contemporary couple get something out of their wheelhouse at last--let's mix things up already! Seems like we're not getting any video intros yet, just rehearsal footage. Melanie tells us that the dance is a battle between femininity and masculinity, and then whoosh! It's time to perform. (I am LOVING this pacing. Thank you, producers!)
Interestingly, while Alex is clad in a fairly typical paso outfit, tight pants and bolero jacket, so is Sasha! They skipped the frilly dress and put her in also-tight pants and a fringy half-shirt. Her postures are stronger than Alex's, and it feels more like two matadors fighting than the bullfighter-and-cape story we usually get. The music is all drums, lots of different rhythms, and the dance is broken into distinct "scenes," where they'll pose, stop, and pose again. At the end, Alex chokes Sasha, she shoves his hand away and stalks off, then returns to plant a passionate kiss on him. Cat warns the judges not to start in with the smooching themselves, and Nigel asks Sasha if it was choreographed or spontaneous. She says, "I don't know," and seems a little bemused herself.
Nigel likes the way the choreography used Sasha's strength and didn't conceal it, and he felt that Alex kept up with her well. OMG, he's actually critiquing dance! Maybe all our gratitude for Travis last week has rubbed off on His Nibs. He calls out a little weakness on a grand jete, but admires Alex's aerial cartwheels. Tells Sasha she's brilliant. Mary shouts to the audience, "Can I get an ole?" And she does. She loves the choice not to make Sasha the cape, and tells her she was the bull, the matador and the cape all at once. Loved when she took on the "male" role of the leg crawl (when the dancer is kneeling and moves across the floor) and loved Alex too. No screaming for the tamale train, perhaps because one ole is enough. Did Jesse like it? He did! Praises them both, and tells us that Sasha had some trouble in rehearsal because her bra was falling off, "as bejeweled bras are wont to do." Cat asks him coyly how he knows that, and he just says knowingly, "I do." He also feels that Alex has finally stepped up to Sasha's level. Sonya loves Sasha because of her fierce strength, and likes Alex as well, though warns him that sometimes his partnering is not as strong as it could be. Alex closes by telling us that Melanie and Tony are dedicating the dance to their friend Bob, who is fighting cancer. Awwww.
Next up! Jordan and Tadd are performing a Travis Wall contemporary about "women taking advantage of weak men." Sigh. OK, I'm getting off my dance-theme high horse. Apparently Jordan will be the psychic vulture to Tadd's dying man. Travis promises us that it will be "a really dark and heavy piece." As we begin the performance, Tadd is lying onstage shirtless, which should please a number of viewers right off the bat. Jordan is dressed in black tulle and feathers like a bird, looming over him. The music ("Brotsjor" by Olafur Arnalds) sounds like a thunderstorm. The opening is pretty cool and feels more like a Sonya piece. I bet she's going to love this. Confusingly, halfway through Tadd takes the lead and doesn't seem so dead, but the moves are cool and he gets to leap a lot while Jordan does her typical extensions. Oh! At the end, Tadd has managed to fight her off. Congratulations.
Hee! When the lights come up you can see that they pulled all Jordan's hair up into a tufty pile on top of her head. We start with Mary, who manages "Beautiful! Magnificent!" before she just starts screaming. She tells us Tadd is no longer a surprise, he is just plain good. She also loved Jordan. Jesse? "Travis took the classic 'vulture stalks boy, boy almost succumbs to vulture, boy kills vulture' story that we all know so well..." He's just writing this recap for me, isn't he? He also says Tadd shows that the guys are "in it to win it," to steal from another reality show. I love you, Jesse, but don't bring Tha Dawg in here. Sonya loved it so much she wishes she could swear, but Cat implores her not to. She loved their conviction, technique and cohesion. Nigel begins: "What a happy little story that was..." and we all laugh dutifully, but he does go on to praise Tadd for his b-boy flips worked into the contempo choreography, and loves them both. I'm beginning to think everyone will love everyone tonight, but I must admit that both of these routines have been good.
Ryan and Ricky do Broadway now, dressed a la "Mad Men." Ryan's head looks huge with her hair all pulled back--they've gone for a kind of Audrey Hepburn look with the big sunglasses, but Ryan's more Amazonian than that. Spencer Liff is the choreographer, and the story is about a guy waiting outside the movie theatre when he fantasizes that the star on the poster comes to life. In rehearsal, Ricky worries that he doesn't portray "smooth" but "goofy." Boyfriend looks fierce in a slim-cut suit and fedora, I'll say that much. They're dancing to Ol' Blue Eyes himself, "All I Need Is the Girl."
At the start, Ricky's great! He's acting the part perfectly, acting stunned to see the poster girl wave to him, and breaking into a huge smile when she comes out to dance with him. He is reminding me of young Obama here. Ryan is doing everything right, but there's something a little drag-queeny about her performance to me. Or maybe it's just her styling? I know I'm always mean about her, but this was a charming piece and (combined with Nigel's influence) should keep them safe.
Huh--could I have come around prematurely? Jesse starts us off insisting he's big fans of R&R, but says that he felt there was a "glass ceiling" on the performance. Basically, they can be bigger and they didn't sparkle for him. The audience boos, and he is at once tickled and sad. Sonya is also underwhelmed, and felt like they were simmering, not boiling. Man, I misread this one, I guess! Or are the judges finally critiquing in hopes of rallying a fan base? We shall see...even Nigel thinks it was a little lackluster, and compares it to last week's Bowie routine. He points out that he thought that one was amazing, and they still wound up in the bottom 3, so he's not sure what they're going to do this week. Man, I finally cut Ryan some slack and they don't want me to! Mary loved "the very first 30 seconds" (which, I will point out, were all Ricky) but then felt they lost the style and weren't expressive enough. She says something about the way they come out of turns which seems technically sound but untranslatable to the non-dance-educated. The audience is cheering them madly after such a limp critique, and Cat reminds us that they have a second routine to show us. Better luck next time, kiddies.
Now it's time for Caitlynn and Mitchell, who'll be dancing a hip hop choreographed by Chris of LXD. And Chris has a dance that's not about a romance! Yay, Chris! Although, it's about the child soldiers of Uganda. Easy there, guy. It's still primetime. The dancers are meant to be imploring the audience to see them (Chris is wearing a t-shirt that says "Invisible Children" on it). It's time for the performance, but my cable was acting up due to a summer storm, and now my sound has gone all quiet. I can barely hear Lupe Fiasco, singing the rather too obvious "Break the Chain." Caitlynn and Mitchell are in pants and white tanktops with something printed on them. They clutch their heads and stomp, and run around the stage a lot. Not much of this is dancing yet. Mitchell's hitting fairly hard, but Caitlynn's a little weak, I think. I do like the way they dance right at the edge of the stage, as though they're pressed up against the fourth wall. I don't think this choreo is very good, though--it doesn't show off much of their talent. It feels a little like a dance meant for a bigger group. (I realize I'm not being funny at all...hard to pull off child-soldier humor.)
And then my cable cuts out and we hop right to Sonya's critique. She seems not to like it--she felt the unison wasn't very clear, which interfered with the emotion of the dance. Cat says "I'm getting a feeling of close but no cigar," which makes me wonder if we didn't start with Sonya? We go to Nigel next, anyway, and he agrees. He says he has no problem with the subject of the dance, but all he really wants is to see the pair dancing together, and so when it didn't work, he's left scratching his head over how their dance said "Congo." Mary tries to perk things up a little without rocking the boat--she agrees that the dance didn't show them at their best, but reminds us that they're both very talented. Jesse concurs, commending them on the great power with which they dance. Jesse also didn't get the message of the dance. Sounds to me like this wasn't the dancers' fault, judges! I think Chris Scott needs some more work on choreography...I seem to recall some of his earlier dances this year being a bit lackluster. Hope this doesn't axe Mitchell unfairly.
We have more to see, and I'm not just talking about Cat's feathery hem on her silver dress! It's time for Melanie and Marko, who will be dancing a Louis van Amstel tango! This could be great--I like Louis' choreography, and he tells us there's no story, just dance. Halle-frickin'-lujah! Melanie's gown makes her look a bit thick-waisted, but her hair is marcelled and looks pretty. Marko missed the opportunity to dance shirtless, so we'll deduct points for that. They're twirling and swirling around the stage, leading up to a moment where Marko stands right on the downstage edge and basically dangles Melanie over the audience before flipping her back onto solid ground. He measured it a little too carefully (the way gymnasts in the floor exercise take those little scooting steps into the corners), but it finished up smoothly. I think these two do better when they have a little character to play--just being "strong" is making them a little rigid in the face. But they end on an insane flip? spin? where Melanie slides between Marko's legs and then he reaches under and pulls her back through while flipping her over. Madness!
Nigel starts us off, and is pleased to see that they were truly challenged by the choreography. He asks if they felt challenged, and we cut to the two of them nodding and gasping for breath. Also, Melanie has a swath of red all around one eye that is either makeup or road rash (stage rash?). Nigel also tells us that they improved vastly from dress rehearsal. Mary launches into a quick explanation of the different tangos to give us context for American-style tango, which combines elements of Argentine and International. She says that their pivots and whisks looked uncomfortable, but overall it was good (and also calls out their improvement on dress rehearsal--man, they must have sucked, huh?). Jesse lets me down for the first time with a forced joke about Mary being "the lost Osmond." He also tries to pull off "we people we call show" ironically, but I'm not buying it. However, he tells them they have that indefinable spark that means star quality. Fair enough. Sonya sweetly says, "I don't understand how every time I watch you dance you make me lose my breath." (Cat is touched.) So I guess she thought it was OK. Indeed, she says their conviction makes their passion evident and believable, and they are timeless dancers. Good for them.
Time for our final couple, Clarice and Jess. Uh-oh, they have lyrical hip hop with Chris Scott. Given how his choreography was just received, how good is this going to be for two decidedly un-hip dancers? Although they are in the pimp spot... This dance is about "a woman's insecurities," and Jess is there to tell her that she's beautiful just the way she is. He will do this by tutting. Naturally. The rehearsals do not fill one with confidence.
As we cut to the stage, we see Clarice looking into a mirror in front of the vanity (confusingly, she's holding a hand mirror even though there's a full-size one right in front of her--maybe she's plucking her eyebrows). Jess (in unconvincing skullcap) is painting on the back of the "mirror." Oops, I must retract my skepticism about Clarice as a hip-hopper...she's very crisp! Jess feels a little soft and isn't retracting enough to make his hits feel as exact. Also, the dance is over kind of before it begins--I think there was probably too much set-up before they got to the unison portion.
Mary's going to start us off, and she's smiling. She thought they were amazing, and she loved the number's innocence. (Oh, god, she's spinning off into a self-esteem riff that I'm hoping doesn't grow legs.) She applauds their swag! Jesse starts off, "Um, I didn't care for it HappyOppositeDayILovedIt." I didn't think that was funny, but this was:
"Clarice, do you have a boyfriend?"
"I do."
"Well, I do too, but I think we should get married. It's not going to be a happy marriage, I'm very difficult to be with, but I need you in my life."
And then he sweetly tells Jess that every week he hoped that Jess would make it so that Jesse could see him in person to tell him how great he was. Sonya thinks they're adorable, which is nice, but I wonder if that's going to come back to bite them when they have to do a dark, passionate dance. Nigel loved the simple story, and was a little leery of the opening because it didn't seem to have quite enough bounce, but then they got into it and he was happy. He then tells Christopher, "Stick to these simple stories, rather than going too far abroad, for me." Chris graciously chooses not to shank him over the commercial break.
OK, a little break before we see everybody all over again! And we get our first look at X Factor, featuring the entire judging panel! The commercial opens with a little girl singing "Tomorrow," and we see Simon, Paula, Kim Kardashian (eh) and some dude I don't recognize. Simon is in a pink cable-knit sweater...WTF? Oh, then he gets shmoopy with Paula and I realize this is the fake, nice, "dream" Simon. He's plugging a car called the Volt, which I assume is a hybrid. Then the alarm goes off, Simon puts on his black skin-tight sweater, and the strains of "Live & Let Die" kick off. Also, I believe the black guy I couldn't ID is L.A. Reid? So wait...does he really drive a Volt? Inquiring minds wanna know!
We're back, and it's time for Sasha & Alex's second dance. Unfortunately, it's a Tyce number, "about life." And loss. Well, that's clear. I assume it's contemporary, not Broadway, but they don't tell us in the rehearsal footage. Looks like jazz, though. Onstage, they have a lamppost as a prop, and are dancing to "That's Life," sung by Aretha. Sasha gets to wear a skirt this time, although I don't think the proportions are great. But no one asked me. The showpiece is a really cool lift that goes through like five positions before Alex puts Sasha back down. They definitely seem to be enjoying themselves. If only I knew who was in love with whom! According to this show, that's the only way to appreciate Dahnse.
The audience is on their feet, and Sasha is laughing, but Cat's asking if she's OK. I don't understand what they're reacting to, and Sasha just says, "I don't know, but...we danced." Did someone kiss someone again? I'm really confused. Jesse proves that he's a real fan by referencing Melissa's "This Woman's Work" dance from a couple of seasons ago and talking about how iconic it was, and thought that Sasha's early "Coming Home" dance would be hers, but this blew him away. (He also asks her to say hi to her sister, after whcih Cat dubs him a Superfan.) Alex gets nothing. Sorry dude. Sonya begs to swear again, and Cat refuses, so Jesse offers to bleep her. They're all getting a little punchy. She praises Tyce, and then says to Alex that "this is what I've been praying and hoping for...I was watching you, too!" And she tells Sasha that she made it happen, even at the end. Aha! That explains it...upon rewatching, I can see that she stumbled and wound up on the ground, but saved it. Nigel steps in and tries a little swag of his own, telling us he's going to "keep it real here." Oh, please, dude. But he tells Alex that for weeks he's been in Sasha's shadow, but not tonight! It's nice that they're finally praising him some. They must want to keep him around individually. Mary agrees that they're terrific, and loves the freedom that Alex has finally achieved. Go, them!
Jordan and Tadd tease us with a glimpse of their Broadway costumes before the break, and I'm concerned. But it's a Spencer routine, along the lines of "Sleeping Beauty." Jordan squirms at the notion of kissing Tadd, and I find it annoying rather than endearing. You're 17, kid, you're not 10. And you "slept" with him in your hip hop last week, so quit whining. As the dance starts, Jordan is lying on a clear Lucite table, and the strains of "Out Tonight" from Rent begin. Tad is wearing pants and a long frock vest that looks like half a skirt. OK, whatever. Jordan's in a blue and green tutu. To be honest, I'm not loving this one. I think using a fairly recent Broadway song to dance a different story is working against it, because I found the choreo a little frumpy. But I suspect the judges may not agree with me on this one...
But they do! At least, Sonya does. She begins with, "I'm sorry. I love both of you," which is never good news. In fact, she felt underwhelmed and that the dance was a jumble of things that didn't show off their abilities. Nigel isn't as down on it as Sonya was, but wishes there had been more quirky character to it...basically, it was just OK. Mary agrees that it was too light, with not enough substance when compared to their opening dance. Jesse flirts with Sonya a bit before agreeing with the panel that the routine felt too kitchen-sinky--costumes/music/steps didn't quite go together. But he wraps up with more praise for the vulture dance to remind us all that we liked it. Good man, Jesse, you know how this thing works.
We're getting down to it now--Ricky and Ryan have a Louis van Amstel cha cha. Will he be their savior? Will the cha cha do for them what the paso doble did for Sasha & Alex or the tango did for Melanie & Marko? In reherasal, everyone just says "hot" a lot, and Ricky ends by promising us they'll wind up on the hot tamale train. Can they do it? They've cued up the Enrique Iglesias to help things along. Ryan is in a short little red fringey number, to match Ricky's red shirt. Oof, she seems heavy-footed. SHe's not heavy, but she dances "stompy." I think she got tangled in Ricky's legs at one point, but her dance smile is on full display here. It's far more appropriate than in most of the dances we've seen, but she's not exactly smoldering. Basically, it looked really hard--I think Louis gave them a lot to do--but the audience isn't going crazy.
Nigel starts us off and says that he thought Ricky did a really good job and had "great style and class." But he felt that Ryan overdid it, and her legs were a little too far apart. Mary tells us it was an incredibly fast cha cha, which is nice to point out. She agrees with Nigel that Ryan was sloppy and kind of started great, but ran out of gas. Ricky, however, was amazing--his bachacadas (sp?) and his chasses were excellent. I'm sure you at home were all thinking the same thing. And she finally puts Ricky on the hot tamale train, but leaves Ryan at the station. Sorry, chica! Jesse says "Ryan, you're flirting with me!" The funny thing is, he says that, but I'm thinking he's addressing Ricky until I play it back to type this. Jesse loved them. Sonya said she saw Ricky "basking" in the energy of the cha cha and it made him extremely compelling; and she kindly tells Ryan that her tension comes from her desire to be perfect, and she needs to loosen up a little bit. That's nice. Sonya's a nice lady. A crazy lady, but a nice lady.
So that was interesting! Think the powers that be have given up on Ryan? This sounded like they were trying to ensure that Ricky (whom I think is one of the better dancers) doesn't go home, but they could take or leave Ryan at this point. Hmmm....
Caitlynn and Mitchell have a jazz routine next, choreographed by Travis. Caitlynn is playing a rock star who's just discovered that her paramour is actually married. There will be slapping. Also, it's supposed to be set in the 1970s. And I see that Robert is assisting Travis at rehearsal--hi, Robert! Why are you the only All-Star we've seen? Hmm...apparently Travis thinks that 1970's rock stars wore lacy garters and frilly corsets. Random. Mitchell gets to be all butch in a t-shirt and leather jacket with the sleeves off, and they're dancing to "Piece of my Heart," by Janis herself. I'm dubious about the styling, but the lifts are great, and Caitlynn is strutting like there's no tomorrow. She reminds me of Courtney from Season ? here. I liked it! They were both working it like the rent is due-good for them.
Mary starts this time: "Slightly naughty...a little intense...gutsy...and I LOVED it!" She praises some of the difficult lifts, especially Mitchell's strength, and says she loved, loved, loved it. Jesse also liked it, but his opening joke was too lame and I'm not bothering. He says that although his Twitter fans urged him to be critical when judging, he has nothing bad to say. Sonya says she's scared by how hot Caitlynn is, and loved it, but warns Mitchell that he sometimes loses his face a little bit when the partnering gets complicated. Good point. Nigel agrees with it, and then refrains from saying anything to Caitlynn so that he doesn't look like a dirty old man. However, he does say something interesting in that he didn't think the dancers should ever have been performing for the audience, but instead should have kept it all as though they were just relating to each other, because that would be truer to the intention of the piece. Fair enough.
Our next pair is Melanie and Marko, dancing a contemporary piece by Dee Kaspery. He tells us that the piece is about "couples slipping in and out of light." And apparently there's a light bulb. In rehearsal, Melanie is in another pair of bad shorts. For performance, they are both clad in taupe. Ecch. But the moves are really cool--lots of swaying, pendulum-like effects, and some unusual lifts. There is a lightbulb, but it's not exactly visible against the follow spot that tails the dancers throughout. This dance didn't need a story--it's just a compelling, unusual, beautiful dance. When it ends, the two of them cling to each other and Marko is weeping--I think they're going to miss dancing together. We start with Jesse, who's just shouting and barking and his mind is blown. He names the dance "The Moth Dance" and declares it his favorite of theirs. Sonya says that she's "so grateful that this is the future of dance." And then she starts sounding like a less bitchy, more woo-woo Mia, which I won't continue. Nigel says that he's excited about the new pairs next week, except for these two, because he loves seeing them together. He also loves the choreography and felt it flowed magnificently. Mary agrees, surely? Yes, of course. She calls it "an amazing, relevant piece of work" and loved their transitions, their connections, and just thought they were flawless. Enjoy following that, Clarice and Jess!
They get to close the show (yay!) but they're dancing a jive (boo!). I don't have a problem with the jive, but it's another of those dances that people never seem to like, no matter how hard the dancers work. Could be worse--they could have drawn the quickstep. Tony and Melanie are choreographing this one, and they appear to be working them like dogs. Ooh! The performance starts, and Clarice is in a feathery purple dress, and the music is what they used for that awesome Discovery Channel ad last year. The captions tell me it's "Ain't Nothing Wrong With That" by Robert Randolph & the Family Band. And damn! Jess can move his feet, I gotta say--I think he's the first guy on this show I've ever seen who really seemed to get the kicks & flicks like. Unfortunately, when he has to lift Clarice (for the first time in 3 weeks), everything slows down and it gets labored. There's a cute move where he slides under her legs, instead of the other way around (which makes sense because in her heels she's like four inches taller than he is). I think it slowed down at the end, but they acquitted themselves pretty well. It wasn't amazing, and Jess is gasping for air like a winded horse, but I think they did enough.
More than enough, according to Sonya. She says "love it" a bunch of times, and then "Perfect. Amazing." We're running out of time, so no more from her. Nigel also loves it, loves Jess's high kick, but points out that his lifts look unbalanced. He worries that it might not be enough to get voters, but he hopes it will. Mary loved the kicks as well, but noted that it lost steam as it went along. She also felt that Jess lost the joy in his face (which interestingly, was her problem with him in auditions), but Clarice was there all along. Jesse agrees with the judges, he says, but then says to Jess, "I'm not the mayor of Broadway--Neil Patrick Harris is--but I will e-mail him and make him give you the keys to Broadway." And then he points out that the Emmy noms are tomorrow and shouts out our beloved Cat Deeley! It's true--she's a great host, and she gets snubbed every year. C'mon, Emmy people! Do a girl a solid!
And that's all she wrote! Tune in tomorrow to see which dancers get cut before the tour, and who goes on to meet a new All-Star partner. I think we'll see Ryan & Ricky in the bottom again, along with probably Jordan & Tadd and Clarice & Jess. If that's the case, I imagine they'll boot Jordan, but what about the guy? I think they want to hang on to all three of them, and would have preferred to lose Alex (well, except not tonight). Some tough choices, to be sure. See you then!
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